11 October 2016

Confessions of a Type A Mom


1 Corinthians 14:33For God is not a God of disorder but of peace--as in all the congregations of the Lord's people.
I don't know how it happened.  I don't know when it happened.  But  lately I've noticed just how Type-A I can be.  Some people think that it is a wonderful trait because you are driven, and punctual, and your life has order, but the more I see how Type A I am the more Type B I wish I could be.  

John, the love of my life is Mr. Type B.  You know the saying, opposites attract.  Mr. Type B with a cigar in his mouth on a beach towel and a book in hand.  He can relax.  He can breathe, he has goals but he isn't crazy about achieving them in an impractical time frame.  He loves going to church but he doesn't need to be there on time.  Everything is rosy cozy and bathroom robe terry cloth feeling.  Nothing phases him.  I've never seen him anxious or rushed.  It drives me nuts!  (He's so lucky)

Not me.  Not ever.  Everything is planned.  Listed.  Documented. Re-planned.  Photos are taken 6 months before they are needed.  Birthday parties are planned months in advance.  And by planned I mean invitations are sent out to a close friend to design and print, the goodie bags are prepped and waiting, and the theme is carefully planned to suit each child's favorite interest of the moment.  

Our meal plan is scheduled the month before.  I actually have no more time for list writing but if you could see the lists I complete in my brain for MOPS, Big Kids, Taekwondo, laundry, cleaners, swim class, gymnastics, church, Missional Community, etc you would see check marks, color coded by each person in the family (Julia-pink, Mark-blue, Micah-green, Amelia-purple, John-black).  There is so much to remember and plan and prepare for at all times!

And sometimes it works out beautifully and I feel great, and other times it's so stressful for me.  I have noticed that I need order for my brain to function and I create rules for myself.  I can't leave the house if our bed isn't made, the garbages aren't out, the sink isn't empty.  There has to be laundry being washed or dried before I leave so that when I get back I can get to the next load.  The counters have to be bare and cleaned.  The front rug has to be vacuumed.  And the toys...the toys...they need to be up and away.  Everything has a place people! I like leaving my home in order so that when I return we can come home relaxed and not have a million things to do.  I also like John to come home to a calm, clean home so in the evening I like to do another clean "toy" sweep before he arrives.

But did you notice that the more Type A you are the more things you find to do?  I can never sit still and enjoy a show unless I'm completely sick.  I have to be doing, cleaning, folding, cooking, baking, teaching.  Sit down?  Rest?  Who has time for that?

As you can see, all of this is completely exhausting for everyone involved.  Why?  Why do we need so much preparation?  Why the lists?  Why the organizational bins?  Why the meal plan?  Because the more my life feels chaotic the more things I have to plan ahead for.  I pack the car the day before we leave.  I leave back packs at the door.  The lunch boxes are labeled and prepped on the counter waiting...

And mom is in a corner crying, with coffee stains on her shirt and drops of sweat coming off her brow, with a dangling curl off the side of her face and a messy top knot bun on her head.  (I am never in a corner crying but you get my point!)

Ok, so you see the dramatic side a bit...(did you know I was a theater/dance major as well as an education major?)  But don't let the coordinating outfits fool you!  I am a hot mess!  I am in the same boat as every other mother out there.  We are all on a mission to do the very best we can, smile in the thick of it, and get to the PTO meeting on time!  None of us has got it all together.  Don't let anyone fool you.  Type A, Type B we are all in need of some serious caffeine and whole steaming pot of grace.

I am learning to embrace my Type A tendencies an sometimes I fully need to embrace John's Type B traits!

My new favorite verse this year as I study the book of John at Bible Study is... 
John 1: 1616 For from his fullness we have all received, grace upon grace.

Type A and Type B Personality Website

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