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| This is my Julia when she was 5 months old! |
"Give thanks with a grateful heart, Give thanks to the Holy One,
Give thanks because He's given Jesus Christ His Son
And now let the weak say I am strong, let the poor say I am rich because of what the Lord has done for us..."
This has always been one of my favorite songs we used to sing at camp and in church. It's an oldie but goodie. I have to be honest, in my mind I am a huge grumbler and complainer. Outwardly I try to be positive, upbeat and happy but inwardly I really struggle sometimes with being thankful, and grateful for just what God has given me. In my mind/heart, I sometimes struggle with keeping score and feeling like I am doing so much at home with two toddlers and I forget just how hard John works and how much he does for us.
Last weekend I had an inward battle because as John went off to Love Your Neighbor outreach program our church has at 6:30 a.m. on a Saturday to help people in the community, I began grumbling and complaining. "Again! Another weekend! We never see him! We miss him! What about loving your family!" I wanted to cry out. Instead during my devotions (Jesus Calling by Sarah Young) God spoke tenderly to me and said, "Kristi, are you trusting me? Kristi, are you thankful for all I have given you? Kristi, do you know how much John loves you? Kristi, don't you want a husband who is willing and excited to serve?" Yes, Lord. I said. "Well then Kristi, show me by changing your attitude..." It wasn't harsh, it wasn't cold, it was so lovingly said and immediately I felt like I really had so much to be thankful for. That moment with the Lord allowed me to greet John excitedly at 2pm when he got home. I couldn't wait to ask him how his time went. I truly was happy he went, even though we did miss him, I had a fun day with the kids at the library family time that they have on Saturdays at 11:00. God allowed me to share my John, with a thankful heart and not a stingy one!
Thankful Thursdays are all about remembering how God is in control. Remembering that God loves us and is trustworthy even when we don't understand why certain things happen. God is always blessing us and giving us things we don't deserve and it is our choice to choose a thankful attitude over an angry or bitter one.
So, as always I will be honest and transparent with you because I believe when we share our struggles it connects us and it allows others to feel safe and accepted and it also shows that God isn't finished with us yet and we are all working towards living a life of thankfulness to the Lord.
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| I'm thankful for family time! |
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| I'm thankful for my Julia who gets my sense of humor and tells me she loves me! |
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| I'm thankful for my Mark who is getting so big and so funny...he's my mini John! |
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| I'm thankful for the little gymnast I see in Julia! I'm so proud of her hard work on Fridays! |
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| I'm thankful for my SIL Laurie! She is always willing to help me! |
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| I'm thankful for friends to laugh with and share a bit of the city with! |
I love how honest you are in this post. You are completely open and it takes a lot to tell us how you were really feeling. There have been times when I have done the same as you but I feel like I have to hide that from others or they may not see me as a "good Christian". Thank you for an inside look! <3 you!
ReplyDeleteA powerful post!
ReplyDeleteYour vulnerbility is such an encouragement! Way to keep it real and offer your learning experiences to help others grow too! xoxoxo C
ReplyDelete