18 September 2013

Could I Be the Worst Mom Ever

Book Club Wednesday-Ch 2

"Write injuries in dust, benefits in marble."--Benjamin Franklin
Sadly, we've all been there.  The moment when you realize you are NOT the perfect mom you strive to be.  
Whether it was lack of sleep, a rough morning, lack of patience, a sharp tongue, whatever it was, you know you've crossed the line and you FEEL horrible.

Lysa Terkeurst, mom of 5 (3 girls and 2 adopted boys) describes her "worst mom ever moment" in grave detail.  Her husband was out of town, she was left to manage all the kids, had to bring them to soccer practice, had to feed everyone breakfast, had to pick up other kids, meant to read her Bible and have devotions before she left, but it didn't happen and her morning went bad really quick.  The moment that stuck out to her was when she told her daughter to hold the drinks from the fast food restaurant, and somehow the drinks ended up all over the car floor (oh I feel her pain...I detest messes and spills, and with little ones it happens all the time)  She tells her daughter, 

"Ashley I told you to hold the drinks!" To which her daughter responds, "You made me spill the drinks!" (bad move honey) ....the rest of the situation went from bad to UGLY..."I whipped my head around to my daughter and yelled, "Shut up and eat your d*** biscuit!" And I wasn't talking about the little houses beavers make.  No there it was in broad daylight...a cuss word that spilled from my lips.  The same lips that read bedtime stories, say nighttime prayers and tenderly kiss my kids goodnight."
As I read this story I thought of the many times I have failed as a mom.  Let's face it.  We aren't machines.  We get tired.  We get cranky.  We lose our tempers.  We don't mean to.  We aren't perfect.  But we fail.  And the question is...then what?  What do you do after you mess up big time and fail.

Apologize?...of course!  It does not make us weak as parents to apologize to our kids!  It teaches them the right way to respond after a mess up.  It shows our kids we are not too proud to humble ourselves and say, "Mommy was wrong...I'm sorry...will you forgive me?"  It teaches our kids that we need grace too.

Lysa called a friend after this happened.  She felt so awful she had to tell someone what happened.  Want to know her friend's advice?  I loved it.

"That's it?  That's it?  That's what you're so upset about?  Apologize to her, ask God for forgiveness and get over it.  So you had a hard morning.  Stop letting Satan get the best of you and ask God to give you a new attitude."
What I love about her friend's response...there was no condemnation...there was no judgement. We all need a friend or two like this...thank goodness for them.  These are the women who are full of grace, who have been there in the trenches just like you, and offer freedom.  Freedom to be the person who makes mistakes and learns from them.

Have you ever had "a worst mom ever" day?  Don't let it drag you down.  Apologize to your precious kids.  Ask God to forgive you.  And get over it.  Move on.  You can still be mom of the day tomorrow!  Fear not, there's not a mom out there who hasn't had a bad moment.  Pray for a new attitude and for strength.

And you know what...share your moment with someone you trust...who won't condemn you...I bet she will share too!


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