27 February 2013

Mark's Struggles as Being the Middle Child

Yesterday, Mark and I had a two hour date!  Julia had a birthday party to attend and so it was just me and my guy.

First, we bought Mark some brand new neon green, and black sneakers!  They are so cool.  We hit up the Toy Genius at the Old Bridge Shoppes and Mark picked out two cop cars and some stilts, and then we went to Panera Bread for lunch.  The boy ate an entire Classic salad (yes he did share with me).

We ended our date with getting Mr. Mark a much needed hair cut at Snip and Snap kids (best place ever for you to get your child's hair cut.).

I love spending time with my guy...and lately Mark has really needed some TLC.

Please pray for him because I do believe this baby is going to be hard for Mark to adjust to.  Although at Toy Genius he DID pick out, all on his own, a toy for Micah which I had to buy because Mark picked it out.  And he does check the bassinet in my bedroom every morning to see if the baby "magically" appeared there yet.

But I think because Mark has been the only boy, and they youngest for almost 4 years, he really got used to his role...and now that is all about to change.  He is excited about helping mommy with the baby, so that's good.  But on Friday when we were driving the babysitter home, he told us all to Puh-lease stop talking about Baby Micah!  He said he was tired of hearing that name!  That really made me stop and think, "do I talk about the baby too much?"  I think we all are just so excited we forget that it may be hard for the middle child.

I am the Middle child in my family.  I have an older sister who is 7 years older than me and a younger sister who is 8 years younger than me and honestly we probably all felt like the only child or first born for so long...but I clearly remember being very excited for Sara to arrive, but when she was born I was very jealous at how enamored my parents were with her, especially my dad.

I remember she would be in the car seat on the kitchen table and my dad would just talk to her, and she would coo, and he would just eat her up!  I was so jealous at the attention she got.  I felt so left out.  At one point we had a family meeting and I remember telling my parents that it felt like we were being treated like silver and Sara was treated like gold.  Pretty funny comment coming from an 8 year old, I know, but that is really how I felt.

So I am really trying my best to give Mark extra mommy time.  Extra book time.  Extra one on one date time.  And we even purchased a bag full of presents for each Julia and Mark for the hospital so that we can tell them that their baby brother Micah picked out the gifts for them.

I also have this book from a friend that is called, "You're all my Favorites."  It's about a family of bears with 3 bear cubs and each one thinks someone else is the favorite and mommy bear and daddy bear assure each child they are loved just for who they are.  And it's certainly true.  I can remember having contractions with Mark when Julia was 17 months old and crying in the car because poor Julia's whole life was going to change and how could I love this new baby as much as I loved her??? Then I had Mark and WOOOSH the love came!  I do feel the same way about this baby...how can I love another little boy as much as my adorable red head son who snuggles me, tells me he loves me in my ear, caresses my face, tells me I'm pretty, tells me he likes my hair, I mean he is such a sweetie...how will I love this baby as much as my Mark?  But I know the minute I have the baby WOOOSH the love will come.

So if you think of it, please pray for Mark's adjustment as the middle child and pray for us as parents that we meet all of our children's needs.  That we instill a great love inside of them, and that they all know they are indeed our favorites and that we love them equally and the same and yet uniquely because each one is so unique.

And for those of you who have 3 or more and you have advice about how you handled the "middle child insecurities" please let us know!


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