26 January 2014

Every Mom Has A Story: Kim Porter

Every Mom Has A Story:  Kim Porter

Kim and I became fast friends when we both realized how close in age our boys were.  Her Liam and my Micah are only weeks apart and it's been so nice to swap stories and watch our boys get bigger together.

Kim and Brenton are a fantastic couple we met at church.  John and Brenton have worked on the wiring of JW flat screens together (our church has a new facility and for the past few months a lot of men and women have been volunteering their time to transform the once Daycare to our church)  The transformation has been amazing!

Kim and Brent both are very talented musically and very funny!  They both are a part of our church's worship team.  I was so excited to interview Kim to get to know her better and also because she has so much godly wisdom!

Here is her story...

1.)  When/Where did you and Brenton meet?

Brenton and I met on August 23, 2002, the first day of my freshman year in college, on a soccer field at Cedarville University.  My roommate wanted a glow stick necklace, but we couldn't find who was handing them out.  I spotted two guys that had them and suggested we go ask...and the rest is history!  

Just kidding about the Disney ending.  

Truthfully I thought Brenton's roommate Matt was hot and friend-zoned Brenton for two years while I dated other people. Obviously, he clawed himself out of said friend zone because he managed to convince me to marry him and have his baby.  

2.)  How long were you married before you decided to have kids?

Brenton and I waited 5 years before I became pregnant with Liam.  We really wanted time to find ourselves individually and as a couple before we added anyone else into the mix.  It allowed us to do some traveling, go back to school, and focus on our marriage.  

3.)  You are a teacher!  How long have you been teaching?  Do you love it?

I've been teaching for 7 years now and have taught every grade 7-12!  I teach Literature (Reading/Writing) and absolutely love it.  I've always known I wanted to work with teenagers (large quantities of little people freak me out) and God really made my personality a great fit for that age group.  I really can't see myself doing anything apart from educating or mentoring teenagers.

4.)  How do you balance teaching, your son, and your hubby?

 In an ideal week, I do all my meal planning and prepping on Friday night and go food shopping Saturday morning.  That way everything's chopped and ready for the week and it's easier to throw dinner together.  Liam goes to bed at 7, so that leave a few hours for extra planning, grading, and prepping his bag for Daycare.

The real deal is that sometimes I have scrambled eggs for dinner, stay up late to finish grad work (I'm finishing up my Masters), my house is covered with dirty laundry, and I forget to feed the dog until she reminds me!  Brent and I do manage to have a quality date night as least once a week, even if it's at home.

Honestly, I couldn't do any of it without Brenton.  He's absolutely incredible and supportive and shoulders more of his share of housework and baby duties.

6.)  What do you appreciate most about Brent as a dad?

I appreciate his selflessness.  Brenton will always sacrifice himself- his wants, his desires, his time- to serve both Liam and I.  He also started a book of letters to Liam that he writes in every few months.  He writes general information about Liam's development, life lessons about friends and family, what he knows to be true about God- and is planning to give it to Liam when he graduates from high school.  A lifetime of letters from father to son- what's more beautiful than that?

7.) What is your favorite part of motherhood?

Liam's young yet, so I'm sure I have many joys and trials to come, but I suppose my favorite part is watching his personality come through.  Everyday is something new to discover about him and I imagine he's going to be quite the determined, stubborn, curious little guy!  

Mostly I'm humbled.  I can't believe that God entrusted me with this kid- what was He thinking?!  What do I know about nurturing the heart of a child?!  I daily ask for patience and joy in the midst of crying or baby puke or a messy house and unwashed hair, and He always delivers.  

6.) What legacy are you trying to leave behind for your family?

That's a tough and loaded question.  The legacy I desire to leave is not necessarily the one I'm leaving (I am human after all).  I guess I want my children to remember me as being humble and honest.  God has taught me over the years to be honest and apologize, even if it's really embarrassing.  I war with myself over it, but revealing your sin and mistakes and asking for forgiveness is glorifying to God.  It also shows a humble model to our children- We all sin and fall short of the glory of God.  

8.)  I love your voice!  How long have you been singing?

My illustrious singing career began with a 6 year old's rendition of Under the Sea, complete with Jamaican accent in my parent's kitchen.  My accents haven't gotten any better, but I managed to stay involved in school and church theater up until high school graduation.  I was in Gospel Choir in college and sang for a few award-type shows as well.  Now, I mostly sing for the church worship team (and a certain 9 month old boy who can't run away even if he wanted to).

9.) You and Brent are the funniest couple, have you always been so witty?

First of all- thank you!  When I read this question I literally laughed out loud.  Who knew I was known for being so witty and hilarious?  We're idiots!  I guess I could say it started because my family is really loud and talkative, so when you say something it should count.  On the whole, though, it's probably that I'm embarrassingly honest, try not to take myself too seriously, and enjoy witty movies and books. Brenton and I have been known to (albeit accidentally) spend an entire dinner talking only in quotes from Zoolander and Arrested Development. 

10.)  What advice would you give to new parents?

Take it one day at a time.  There will be horrendous days, really sweet ones, and ones that seem to get away from you.  Don't let anyone or anything make you feel that you are failing somehow.  Everyday as a parent feels like a lesson in failure anyway.  Someone else's kid is hitting milestones faster.  Someone else had no problems breastfeeding.  Someone else had a better birth story than you.  Someone else's baby started sleeping through the night by 3 months.  Someone else's kid can recite the alphabet and explain Einstein's theory of relativity and make a mean chili for a family of four.  

Breathe.  God has entrusted you with this incredible little person that he knows every detail about.  Trust in Him.  Rest.  Let the house be dirty.  Order takeout.  Buy baby food (gasp!) instead of always making your own.  Rejoice that your kid isn't walking yet because that means you can hold him longer.  We only get 18 years out of our whole lives to live, love, and argue with our children.  It's so fleeting when you think about it.  There's no time to try to be perfect.

Kim, your words really inspired me.  I always want to be perfect and I am always competing (in my head) with other moms.  God really convicted me that this is not only wrong but damaging.  Thanks for your honesty!


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