03 January 2014

What if my child isn't an honor roll student?


Julia and Mark at Princeton Univ.  Photo by Erin Nicastro Photography

Wednesday Book Club

Chapter 16

"The only measure of what you believe is what you do.  If you want to know what people believe, don't read what they write, don't ask what they believe, just observe what they do."--Ashley Montagu

Have you ever been so guilty of being a rule follower that you couldn't see the forest for the trees?  Lysa Terkheurst, the author of this book: Am I Messing Up My Kids, gave an awesome illustration of how during a home school writing assignment she got so hung up on the grammar and punctuation and spelling of an assignment that she totally missed an amazingly awesome paper written by her daughter sharing how she wanted to help in Africa in an orphanage.  Lysa was so hung up on the "bad grammar" and "rules of writing" that she realized she missed the bigger picture.

Since I also home school I can totally relate.  Sometimes, in an effort to just hurry up and get things done I forget the bigger issues like bonding with my kids, really listening to them, and taking time to get to know them and hear their hearts.  Sometimes, I just want to be done.  And sometimes I just want things my way.  I often forget that my children are watching me and listening to me.  Remember the phrase, "Do as I say, not as I do?"  That is also a conviction for me.  

I'm really really thankful for a God who gives me so many chances and such forgiveness.  I feel like I mess up a lot.

Lysa states, "It's easy to slip into the mode of looking at but not really seeing our kids."  I'm glad I'm not the only one.  I think the bigger family you have the more challenging this gets too, because this has definitely gotten harder recently.

Lots of us get bogged down by the teeth brushing, the baths, the meals, the laundry, the school work, and wondering if they ate enough veggies, we forget that although these things are important...in light of eternity what really matters is the heart.

Lysa gave a great reminder. "Capture a moment today in which you really see someone else.  Look beyond their surface mistakes to see their heart.  Maybe its your child.  Maybe it's a spouse, neighbor or friend."

Today's Mom challenge for Day 3 is to hug your child 3 times today...I think love and hugs is a great place to start!


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