Chapter 3: His Finances
This was a super short chapter, but this chapter could have been written by my husband the financial advisor. He is now working for Morgan Stanley and he loves his job and let me tell you, he is good at what he does. John went to Pace University in NYC and majored in business and finance and his mind just works around numbers and percentages and he is super analytical. Let's just say he's everything I am not...which does not make me bad, it just makes us a perfect match because he has taught me so much about budgeting and credit cards, and savings and investing.
John is very wise with his money, and very frugal. Sometimes I like to tease him and say that his pockets are sewn shut, but in all honesty, I know God has blessed us financially because of how faithful John is with tithing and with conserving our money. And John by no means scrimps on the important things, when he plans a European vacation or thinks ahead to plan a birthday or anniversary surprise he spares no expense.
He teases me and says I am a grazer type shopper where I get a little here and there, and he is a one time big spender.
One thing I've always appreciated about John is that he has never been the type of man to withhold information to me or act like his salary is his salary and when I was teaching and making a salary I did not do that either. We share one checking account and savings account and we have a very open relationship about our finances. Our main goal is to use it wisely and honor the Lord with the money He has blessed us with. John does this really cool banking system on the computer where the software he has automatically graphs in a pie chart all our spending each month. This way we can see how much we spend on food, clothes, entertainment, tithe, school loans, our mortgage, etc.
Before kids, I'm a little embarrassed to say because this was very out of line, and trust me I've gotten a lot better, but John showed me the pie chart and there was one month where I spent like $400 on clothes. Even though we could afford it, the message was clear, my spending was not careful, but out of control, I wasn't being a good steward. Boy have I learned my lesson.
Stormie O'Martin was sharing in this chapter that finances can really put a strain on any marriage if both partners are not doing their share of being responsible, having a lack of money, or huge debt can be the source of many arguments, bitterness and hard feelings.
Of course she also mentioned the importance of tithing...now when John and I got engaged, John was a new believer, just baptized and still learning all the "ropes" of how to live for Christ and honor Him with everything in his life. John grew up with the mentality that you can never have enough money and you work hard to be successful. Money was put on a pedestal and he never wanted to not be able to provide for us as a family...his main focus was to make a lot of money so we would never have to worry. But as God softened John's heart he learned to trust God with a new Taekwondo school, he learned to trust God by tithing faithfully, and he learned to trust God with all his finances. And God poured out his blessings on us. After 9/11 John left a NYC finance job to start his own karate business in NJ. That was scary for both of us because we wanted to buy a home, we had to pay for our entire wedding and honeymoon. John's school opened up in September of 2002 and guess what? He had 80 students the first month! That is unheard of. Let's just say he was well paid and the students tuition covered all the schools bills. What a blessing!
Since then we've kept our wallets and hearts open to the Lord and just have learned to trust him. I am thankful for all of John's hard work because now that we have kids I have been able to stay out of work for 3 years to be at home with them! Another huge blessing!
Commit your finances to God and He will bless you! Be good stewards of all He brings your way.
Pray that your husband will:
1. Find it easy to give to God and others
2. Have wisdom in handling money wisely
3. Make good decisions in how he spends money
4. Be open to God showing him how to plan for the future
5. Find the perfect balance in spending needlessly and being miserly
6. Always be paid well for the work he does
7. That God will multiply your money so that it goes a long way
Scripture to ponder... (this is only parts of the verses)
Luke 12: 29-31 Do not seek what you should eat or what you should drink, nor have an anxious mind...
Ecclesiastes 5:19 As for every man to whom God has given riches and wealth...
Proverbs 28:27 He who gives to the poor will not lack
Psalm 37:25 the righteous will not be forsaken
Philippians 4:19 God shall supply all your needs
"Whatever you put your time, energy, and money into will become more important to you. It's hard to care for something you are not investing in. Along with restraining from negative comments, buy your spouse something that says, "I was thinking of you today."
1. A card
2. Their favorite candy bar
3. Movie tickets
4. Favorite DVD or CD
5. Favorite store bought dessert from a bakery (my hubby loves those tri colored cookies from the Italian bakery...hope he doesn't read this b/c I think I may just have to get him a few)