13 January 2012

Keeping our Family Strong

Christmas 2011 at our home
I read an article by Gary Smalley this week that talked about families and marriages.  It was called, "Remember how it all began: cherishing your spouse in the parenting years."

Love.  I think that is one of my favorite words.  You are going to hear a lot about LOVE this year.  Today we are going to focus on loving your spouse.

Most of you who read my blog are married, for those of you who aren't don't stop reading, file what I'm about to say in your mind because it is SO important to keeping a strong and healthy marriage.

It's called touching.  I don't mean s%x.  That is important too.  But today I'm going to talk about love touches.  This article stressed something that I already knew was important but Gary Smalley put it into plain words.  He calls it 12 Touches.  12 Touches throughout the day is how you and your spouse show each other LOVE and care and tenderness, and also model to your children the commitment you share to one another.  Remember when you used to see your own parents hug or kiss?  Remember you might have acted like you were grossed out?  Deep inside it made you feel good, even happy and safe, to know that your parents loved each other and were committed to each other.  Because that meant your family was strong.

John and I go through hours almost all day of not seeing each other.  The minute he gets home I feel better.  I may not run into his arms and pepper him with affection right away, but you better believe I do as the evening goes on.  Gary Smalley talks about how holding hands, smooches, gentle pats, etc, are so good for keeping the LOVE alive in your marriage.  It keeps you connected.  It shows the person you care, you need them, you adore them.

When I told John about this article he loved it.  Then I started teasing him and poking him 12 times to use up all my touches...but that led to a tickle fest, which is also great touching!  One of John's languages is Physical Touch, so he verified this article immediately.  One thing we have to do from time to time is 30 seconds.  30 seconds is when we hug for that long because we just need a long hug.  Some days are just harder than others or we missed each other a lot, and one will say, "I need 30 seconds."  Then you know who wants to join us...Mark, Julia, and Paris!  It usually turns into a group hug.

Here are some Love Touches examples...be sure to get your 12 in (or more of course) each day!

*Holding hands
*Gentle pat as you pass by
*Back rub
*Hand on the shoulder

The article also said Laugh often...yes, laughter is soooo good!

 "A person without a sense of humor is like a wagon without sprigs--jolted by every pebble in the road.  Good humor makes all things tolerable."

***Happy Birthday to my Father in law Jack today and my best friend Christy!!! January 13th is a very special day!


1 comment:

  1. Super post! Especially important for those of us whose husbands have physical touch as their love language!


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