04 March 2010

Book Club Thursday--Chapter 9

Joyce Meyer's The Confident Woman
Chapter 9 Are Women Really the Weaker Sex?

1 Peter 3:7 Husbands, likewise, dwell with them with understanding, giving honor to the wife, as to the weaker vessel, and as being heirs together of the grace of life, that your prayers may not be hindered.

(says that we are indeed physically weaker, but nothing more)

The focus of this chapter was not male bashing, because that would be sinful. But really just a celebration of how uniquely we are made by God. No, we might not have the physical strength that men do...but we have the amazing strength to bring a child into this world (more about childbirth in a minute), we have endurance to run a household, manage a checkbook, take care of husband and children, and help them reach their dreams, we have determination that does not allows us give up easily or leave our families the way many dads have done, leaving single mothers to raise children on their own below the poverty line.

Child Birth

I am one of those crunchy granola women who really believes in natural child birth if possible. With both my children I had a birth plan and I told my Obgyn I did not want an epidural. I used a laboring tub both times and was able to deliver my mark in the water, which was a truly awesome experience. Now, let me tell you those 7 or 8 hours when I was in labor with both of my children required A LOT of strength, endurance, and determination. It was extremely difficult, but the pain had a purpose, and I wouldn't have done it any other way if I could do it all over again. With Julia it took me 45 minutes of pushing to birth her, with Mark, about 3 seconds...and 3 great pushes, and he was here! I am so thankful I didn't get pain meds because I was able to listen to my body and really focus on the beauty and the job of helping to bring my children into the world. But John will tell you, he could never have done that without pain meds. It actually pained him to see me have each contraction. God chose women to birth the babies because of our inner strength. And I couldn't have done it without the Lord. I knew He was there with me and that he was protecting my baby each time. Every woman's birth experience is different by the way, and I don't judge anyone because I KNOW how difficult it can be. So if you decide/decided to use an epidural that is totally your decision. Please don't think I am saying I did it the right way. I just did it the way I felt was best for me and my situation.

Joyce says, "Refuse to see yourself as the weaker sex." I like how she talked about all the things women can do when they love their husbands and their children "fiercly." And all of us do! Women are able to work through difficulties and take responsibility of raising children alone when men have walked out. I couldn't get over the statistic that in 2006 the census bureau stated that there are 10 million single mothers and 34% fall under the poverty line making only $15, 670 (That figure to me is astounding...to some that is their tithe for the year...and to think some families live off of that in a year!) Can you imagine what the stats are today??? It is so sad to see so many fatherless families, I could cry over those families...and who ends up suffering the most, the children.

It pains me to also hear men say (and I've even heard working moms say this to stay at home moms...there is a secret war between the two) that stay at home moms do nothing all day. Oh. my. word. All I know is if John ever said that, and trust me, he knows that isn't true, we would have a serious discussion. Truthfully women like me who are homemakers indeed are blessed to be home, but let me tell you, and I think I speak for all of us stay at homers, that it is no picnic. It is a full time job that until you live it, it is best not to comment about it. I've left my home for an hour to go food shopping and when I return John looks at me with sincere appreciation and says, "How do you do this all day?" And I smile and say (Thank you Lord) only with God's grace and help, because it isn't easy.

Do your job with joy!!! I learned this lesson the hard way. I could complain about how much I missed teaching, or I could actually take this time the Lord gave me to live it with joy and bless my husband and family. And trust me, when my attitude and focus changed, I began to feel more satisfied and joyful!!! Also, it helps to have godly, christian friends who are stay at home moms and doing their job with joy as well...that is another reason why I love Suzette so much and her godly example as a wife and mommy to Addie. See her post today at http://godlyrose.blogspot.com

Joyce says, "It is my world (not a man's world) also and I don't fight--I trust God that He will help me be all that I can be." We shouldn't try to be a man or be something we are not to fit into society or to please others. We need to be ourselves and enjoy our femininity. Even if that means it takes us longer to get ready in the morning!!! Just kidding.

Hosea 4:6 My people are destroyed for lack of knowledge. Because you have rejected knowledge, I also will reject you from being priest for Me; Because you have forgotten the law of your God. I also will forget your children. Joyce brought up this verse to remind us that many relationships between men and women are destroyed simply because of lack of knowledge of the opposite sex. Think about the divorce rate. The stats are staggering. 67% of all marriages end in divorce! Whoa! Wake up people. Men and women are different, we need to celebrate our differences and stop trying to change our husbands but live together in peace. We need to have peace with ourselves about who we are and how God has created us! I think we are pretty awesome! God made us fearfully and wonderfully! He made us unique. Celebrate your uniqueness today with confidence!


  1. I loved your post!!!!! I have had those wonderful moments of coming home after leaving Brian with Addie, and him asking me the "How do you get anything done? How do you do it?" questions. And we only have one child! By the same token, I know I could never do Brian's job.

  2. These are great points, Kristi! Some of the strongest people I know are women. I definitely believe in the Biblical roles- the man is the "leader" and the head of the household. I wouldn't have it any other way. But at the same time, it doesn't diminish our role as women!


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